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Jørgensen_M
Barker
Joined: Mar 08, 2005
Posts: 127
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 Posted:
Mar 29, 2005 - 09:59 PM |
 
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| Post subject: Troubled relationship because of stardom |
Why is it that a relationship in which one of the two persons is a celebrity to a certain magnitude, is doomed to fail?
Why?
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DeeLphiC
Low Seater
Joined: Mar 11, 2005
Posts: 3333
Status: Offline
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Mar 29, 2005 - 10:56 PM |
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Being too busy with own schedule?? spending too little time together?? too many temptations?? I always think emotional bond (mutual understanding, security, closeness, intimacy etc) gets developed when two spend time and experience things together.
something about personal growth too. With so many changes and info. that one can take in going on around in this world, one of the couple may not grow as fast as the other, or, two may grow into totally different directions. Esp. for celebrities. That's why spending time together and knowing what's going on in the other's mind and trying to keep those growth in line with your common outlook upon future and life are very very important.
Just some opinions of a non-celebrity.
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Jørgensen_M
Barker
Joined: Mar 08, 2005
Posts: 127
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Mar 29, 2005 - 11:15 PM |
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Hi, thanks for giving your opinion 
I don't know what it is, but I always have bad luck in this field. I've met two wonderful girls in my life and both were involved in either acting or a career in sports. And both were not girls from one and the same place. One girl is from Denmark and one girl is from China/HK. Is it just me I sometimes wonder, will they have a better life with someone in their own field of work? Am I not capable of understanding what their needs are? |
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DeeLphiC
Low Seater
Joined: Mar 11, 2005
Posts: 3333
Status: Offline
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Mar 29, 2005 - 11:43 PM |
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you are welcome!
relationship in my understanding is about share and exchange, give and take. different professions surely would provide more for exchange, but you get to make sure you two share same life outlook, which is what keep you grow towards similar direction if not same.
Mutual understanding is all about communication - how and when. do not be too confident in your capability of understanding others needs, even if you think you are very understanding. taking each other for granted too much is a killer of relationship.
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itv1980
Low Seater
Joined: Mar 05, 2004
Posts: 3355
Location: Revalidation centre
Status: Offline
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Mar 31, 2005 - 04:48 PM |
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Well I can give you some cases on this too:
There's a very succesful professional dance couple from Italy and there a couple on the floor and off. Their bond is soo strong and that's a reason of their success, but can be a downfall too. Especially when you take your troubles along on the dance floor or your work.
When dating a celebrity, it's a lot of fun and boost of your ego that this famous person is your love. But consider that every move you make, is being photographed, and or altered to provoke scandals by paparazzi's. So picking something up for a waitress, will be broadened as titles: Celebrity X's lover cheats with waitress
Being able to deal with the pressure, roadtrips, odd and long working hours is a burden. But when you support and trust the person and be there for them it can work. There are several cases, which it did work out fine. So it also depends on the person itself and how much your willing to sacrafice. |
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Jørgensen_M
Barker
Joined: Mar 08, 2005
Posts: 127
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Mar 31, 2005 - 04:56 PM |
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DeeLphiC, I dont totally understand what you are saying...
itv1980, its fun to date someone when you like her/him, not because she/he is famous, at least that wasn't my reason. Never had problems with the media, only with her, its not that she was Julia Roberts, not a big time Hollywood star, but I do understand what you mean. I think its more the temptation from her side to do certain things than from my side. |
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lemongrass
StreetBeater
Joined: Jan 15, 2005
Posts: 2330
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Apr 02, 2005 - 12:21 AM |
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Take a look at Jennifer Aniston and Brat Pitt, absolutly they are living in the similar field and are able to know what one needs each other. Now I feel a little bit disappointed to see their divorce. They used to be a nice couple, aren't they?
Hence, J?rgensen_M, I dont think the things you are worrying about are the vital reasons for your failure. Perhaps they have something to do with the relationship, but no big deal. If two are in love with each other, everthing I mean everything should not be a problem. I understand a relationship with a celebrity is quite hard to control and work on, but you can make it work as long as both of you 2 have the resolution. Donot let the external factor be the excause unless there is no love at all between you two!
Or am I the naive person who believes that love could make one strong and brave?!  |
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Missing home! |
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DeeLphiC
Low Seater
Joined: Mar 11, 2005
Posts: 3333
Status: Offline
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| Posted:
Apr 02, 2005 - 03:19 PM |
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| J?rgensen_M wrote: |
DeeLphiC, I dont totally understand what you are saying...
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Ooops ... sorry for the confusion. I was just trying to say that in my point of view, relationship is about sharing common life outlook and general life style, and exchange of personal experience and growth that help with the acheivement of the goal in your common life outlook, and the maintanance of the life style and living pattern that benefit you both the most.
Being in different professions certainly offers more for two to exchange with each other, such as different perspectives, different points of view, being spoken out of different experience, which is good for personal growth, long as the two share common life outlook, and wish to grow together toward the same goal of life.
Communication is of utter importance IMHO for relationship. Mutual understanding is all about communication, about how and when to talk to the other. Even you think yourself a very thoughtful and understanding and openminded person, do not think for others, as you really can not. Ask, talk, be patient, never take for granted, about your experience your acheviement, your frustration, your changes in term of life outlook, what you want and expect from life and from her/him. Just make sure he/she knows who he/she is with and to be with, and if it is what he/she wants and expects. Communication is the only way out, esp., things change so fast, and people change and grow fast too.
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