| Author |
Message |
p1atl10
Board Royalty
Joined: Mar 18, 2005
Posts: 6297
Location: Shanghai
Status: Offline
|
 Posted:
July 30, 2007 - 12:19 PM |
 
|
| Post subject: With apologies to everyone in Europe... |
Please take it as a joke.....That's why I did not post it in the "News"...
With all the US bashing that occurs here (with good reason I might add!), thought I would take a few friendly swipes at my european friends..
EUROPEANS HEIGHTEN THREAT LEVELS
The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved". Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross". Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz began in 1940 and tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance". The last time the British issued "A Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.
Also, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide" . The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.
It's not only the English and French who are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: &n! bsp; "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."
The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose".
Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.
The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy. |
_________________
Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.....Dave Barry |
|
|
|
Andreas
Board Royalty
Joined: Feb 27, 2004
Posts: 6413
Location: 31 N 121 E
|
| Posted:
July 30, 2007 - 01:09 PM |
|
| Post subject: Re: With apologies to everyone in Europe... |
| p1atl10 wrote: |
| The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy. |
LOL! The others I saw before, but this one is new, and funny. |
_________________
If it has tits, tires, or a transom, there's gonna be issues! |
|
|
|
kimmie
Reacher
Joined: Apr 12, 2007
Posts: 256
Status: Offline
|
| Posted:
July 30, 2007 - 04:26 PM |
|
|
Hahaha. Love the stereotypes.
Now let’s see, if it were Americans…
“Completely Asleep at the Controls” (wha’ – how did THAT happen?) to “Cautious Ineptitude” (particularly effective for TB carriers crossing from Canada) to “Total Shake Down of Every Grandma and Baby” (cause you NEVER know what could be in those tubes of Bengay and baby formula) to “Pre-emptive Strike by Justifiable Invasion” (particularly for those terrorists in oil-rich nations). |
|
|
|
|
|
p1atl10
Board Royalty
Joined: Mar 18, 2005
Posts: 6297
Location: Shanghai
Status: Offline
|
| Posted:
July 30, 2007 - 04:54 PM |
|
|
There is a great comedian whose name escapes me (in the genre of Jeff Foxworthy though. One of the southern boys) who advocates the dismantling of the current green, orange, whatever system of 5 colors to a 3-tiered system:
- Everything is ok...
- Go find a helmet.
- Put on the helmet! |
_________________
Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.....Dave Barry |
|
|
|
|
Trent_The_Flight_Steward
Seeker
Joined: May 22, 2007
Posts: 54
Location: In the cockpit...
Status: Offline
|
| Posted:
July 30, 2007 - 05:02 PM |
|
|
Yeah, show them what we are made of! USA! USA ALL THE WAY! Take me home, cuntry road, to the olace where I belong....Sing it Johnny! Sing it boy!
Trent. |
_________________
I love TWISTER! |
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
Forum FAQ
Search
Preferences
Watched Topics
Log in to check your private messages
Log in
