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Nathalie25
Board Legend
Joined: Aug 24, 2004
Posts: 10385
Location: Shanghai
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 Posted:
Oct 23, 2007 - 09:23 AM |
 
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| Juan_Tamad wrote: |
Two men are talking.
The Asian guy said, "I got married because I was tired of eating out, cleaning the house, doing the laundry and wearing shabby clothes."
"Amazing," said the American guy, "I just got divorced for the very same reasons." |
2 guys taking about some women in their office and one of them said that my girl she wanted to stop her relationship with him was just because her man from America and another maN WHO ALSO TALKING ABOUT WOMEN IN HIS OFFICE HE ALSO SAID THAT HIS WOMAN WANNA LEAVE HIM WAS JUST BECAUSE HE IS A BALD~~~~~ |
_________________
功高盖主，必有祸出。人生是人类生命中内心和万般经历的真实写照。 http:/ |
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Juan_Tamad
Board Royalty
Joined: Jan 29, 2007
Posts: 7342
Location: Smoky Mountain
Status: Offline
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Oct 23, 2007 - 03:59 PM |
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After the third day of a really torrid honeymoon, the young couple finally emerged from their room and walked into the hotel restaurant. After they were seated, the waiter came over to get their orders. The new husband looked at his bride and said, "You know what I really feel like honey ?"
"Well sure," she blushed, "But we go to eat sometime !" |
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SirFiddler
Board Legend
Joined: Mar 30, 2004
Posts: 11621
Location: Very close to a bottle of chilled Boags
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Oct 23, 2007 - 04:11 PM |
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"So I hear you and your girlfriend split up recently , what happened ?"
"Well, would you want to be with someone who cheats, drinks and has a bad personal hygiene ?
"No of course not"
"See, neither did she" |
_________________
Special offer at Cuvee : Bring your business card and get a free punch |
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MyNameIsPablo
StreetBeater
Joined: Sep 06, 2007
Posts: 2455
Status: Offline
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Oct 23, 2007 - 04:28 PM |
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An Italian man, a French man and an English man are discussing making love to their wives. The Italian says 'When I make the love to my beautiful wife, she will rise 6 inches from the bed'.
The French guy, not to be outdone, says, 'When I make ze love to ze wife, she rise 12 inches off ze bed'.
The English bloke looks at the other two and says 'That's nothing. I shag the missus and after I finish wipe me knob on the curtains and she hits the roof'. |
_________________
Quiet - Or Papa Spank. |
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Juan_Tamad
Board Royalty
Joined: Jan 29, 2007
Posts: 7342
Location: Smoky Mountain
Status: Offline
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Oct 24, 2007 - 08:55 AM |
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Definition of a bachelor; a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable. |
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foreverinchina
FooJay
Joined: Nov 21, 2005
Posts: 1699
Location: 徐家汇
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Oct 24, 2007 - 01:02 PM |
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A Doctors' Convention
A Japanese doctor says, 'Medicine in my country is so
advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another,
and have him out looking for work in six weeks.'
A German doctor says, 'That is nothing. We can take a lung
out of one person, put it in another, and have him out looking for work
in four weeks.'
A British doctor says, 'In my country medicine is so advanced
that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and
have both of them out looking for work in two weeks.'
The American doctor, not to be outdone, interjected, 'You
guys are way behind. We are about to take a woman with no brains, send
her to Washington where she will become President, and then half the
country will be out looking for work.' |
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Juan_Tamad
Board Royalty
Joined: Jan 29, 2007
Posts: 7342
Location: Smoky Mountain
Status: Offline
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Oct 24, 2007 - 01:41 PM |
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Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. |
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Nathalie25
Board Legend
Joined: Aug 24, 2004
Posts: 10385
Location: Shanghai
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Oct 24, 2007 - 04:29 PM |
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| Juan_Tamad wrote: |
| Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. |
so we now have more than 1000000000 guys that only have one-eyed faces to face their wives and girl friends to relate with,hahah~~~~~~
ANd that's why i never wanna join those people to taalk with them in person,imagine what we girls will think of when we meet one eyed men in public places,lol~~~~~~~ |
_________________
功高盖主，必有祸出。人生是人类生命中内心和万般经历的真实写照。 http:/ |
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Juan_Tamad
Board Royalty
Joined: Jan 29, 2007
Posts: 7342
Location: Smoky Mountain
Status: Offline
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Oct 25, 2007 - 08:49 AM |
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Best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest they are too old for it. |
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Nathalie25
Board Legend
Joined: Aug 24, 2004
Posts: 10385
Location: Shanghai
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Oct 25, 2007 - 09:11 AM |
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you are too old to type your words here, Juan_Tamad~~~~~~
yeah, then you guys will do your best to type your words in this board after you read my words from your toilets~~~~haha~~~~~~ |
_________________
功高盖主，必有祸出。人生是人类生命中内心和万般经历的真实写照。 http:/ |
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Juan_Tamad
Board Royalty
Joined: Jan 29, 2007
Posts: 7342
Location: Smoky Mountain
Status: Offline
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Oct 25, 2007 - 05:16 PM |
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Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself types. |
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Nathalie25
Board Legend
Joined: Aug 24, 2004
Posts: 10385
Location: Shanghai
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Oct 26, 2007 - 09:14 AM |
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i am confused, cause i just knew that all men are the types of do-it-yourself from Juan_Tamad~~~~~~~~~~~~ |
_________________
功高盖主，必有祸出。人生是人类生命中内心和万般经历的真实写照。 http:/ |
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Juan_Tamad
Board Royalty
Joined: Jan 29, 2007
Posts: 7342
Location: Smoky Mountain
Status: Offline
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Oct 26, 2007 - 10:08 AM |
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If you love something, set it free.
If it comes back, it was and always will be yours.
If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with.
If, however, it just sits in your living room,
messes up your stuff, eats your food,
uses your telephone, takes your money, and never appears to have noticed that
you actually set it free in the first place,
You either married it or gave birth to it! |
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Nathalie25
Board Legend
Joined: Aug 24, 2004
Posts: 10385
Location: Shanghai
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Oct 26, 2007 - 04:57 PM |
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some people they like neutral, no matter it involves politics or business or any kind of situation~~~~ |
_________________
功高盖主，必有祸出。人生是人类生命中内心和万般经历的真实写照。 http:/ |
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MyNameIsPablo
StreetBeater
Joined: Sep 06, 2007
Posts: 2455
Status: Offline
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Oct 26, 2007 - 05:38 PM |
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| Nathalie25 wrote: |
you are too old to type your words here, Juan_Tamad~~~~~~
yeah, then you guys will do your best to type your words in this board after you read my words from your toilets~~~~haha~~~~~~ |
You tell him, Nat!!
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_________________
Quiet - Or Papa Spank. |
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Juan_Tamad
Board Royalty
Joined: Jan 29, 2007
Posts: 7342
Location: Smoky Mountain
Status: Offline
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Nov 06, 2007 - 10:03 AM |
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Marriage is love.
Love is blind.
Therefore marriage is an institution for the blind. |
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Nathalie25
Board Legend
Joined: Aug 24, 2004
Posts: 10385
Location: Shanghai
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Nov 06, 2007 - 12:41 PM |
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Single is best, so many many people their eyes are very bright~~~~~~ |
_________________
功高盖主，必有祸出。人生是人类生命中内心和万般经历的真实写照。 http:/ |
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Juan_Tamad
Board Royalty
Joined: Jan 29, 2007
Posts: 7342
Location: Smoky Mountain
Status: Offline
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Nov 07, 2007 - 09:09 AM |
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Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that instead. |
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That_Chinese_Girl
Veejay
Joined: Oct 08, 2007
Posts: 2051
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Nov 07, 2007 - 09:56 AM |
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That's funny...but I like to share my food. I think it's more fun.  |
_________________
Objectivity is the male subjectivity. |
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Nathalie25
Board Legend
Joined: Aug 24, 2004
Posts: 10385
Location: Shanghai
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| Posted:
Nov 07, 2007 - 01:01 PM |
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| Juan_Tamad wrote: |
| Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.ou wish you had ordered that instead. |
so how many wives or husbands do you want to order or have???????? |
_________________
功高盖主，必有祸出。人生是人类生命中内心和万般经历的真实写照。 http:/ |
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Juan_Tamad
Board Royalty
Joined: Jan 29, 2007
Posts: 7342
Location: Smoky Mountain
Status: Offline
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| Posted:
Nov 07, 2007 - 02:17 PM |
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Married life is full of excitement and frustration:
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
In the third year, they both speak and the NEIGHBOURS listen |
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Nathalie25
Board Legend
Joined: Aug 24, 2004
Posts: 10385
Location: Shanghai
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| Posted:
Nov 07, 2007 - 03:16 PM |
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| Juan_Tamad wrote: |
Married life is full of excitement and frustration:
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
In the third year, they both speak and the NEIGHBOURS listen |
then, in the fourth year, they both divorced from each other~~~~~~~ |
_________________
功高盖主，必有祸出。人生是人类生命中内心和万般经历的真实写照。 http:/ |
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CoffeeHawk_0
Board Deity
Joined: July 14, 2005
Posts: 19090
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Nov 07, 2007 - 03:26 PM |
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Nathalie25
Board Legend
Joined: Aug 24, 2004
Posts: 10385
Location: Shanghai
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Nov 07, 2007 - 04:28 PM |
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99.99999999999999% is true~~~~~~~~~ |
_________________
功高盖主，必有祸出。人生是人类生命中内心和万般经历的真实写照。 http:/ |
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That_Chinese_Girl
Veejay
Joined: Oct 08, 2007
Posts: 2051
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Nov 07, 2007 - 04:33 PM |
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But CoffeHawk_0 is the 0.00000000000001% exception. |
_________________
Objectivity is the male subjectivity. |
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