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shinpath
Seeker
Joined: Aug 05, 2005
Posts: 69
Location: Osaka Japan & Shanghai PRC
Status: Offline
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 Posted:
June 09, 2009 - 04:45 PM |
 
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| Post subject: ISO Artists, kooks, mutants, ubermen and uberfemmes |
Looking for any of the above types who may have been exposed to the teachings of J.R. "Bob" Dobbs and the Church of the SubGenius for a possible event on July 5th. PM me here or e-mail shinpath@yahoo.com
For more information on the CoS go to www.subgenius.com
Shining Path of Least Resistance, Khan of All-Shanghai
SubGenius video channels here! |
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shinpath
Seeker
Joined: Aug 05, 2005
Posts: 69
Location: Osaka Japan & Shanghai PRC
Status: Offline
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| Posted:
June 18, 2009 - 02:57 PM |
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SHANGHAI, CHINA, JUNE 16, 2009: In their first announcement in China, members of the Church of the SubGenius have called on all residents to prepare themselves for the End of the World in Shanghai at precisely 7:59 a.m. July 5, 2009 when, for the 11th year since 1998, devotees of J.R.”Bob” Dobbs (see face above) will come together in the USA, UK, Italy, Japan, and now China to await the arrival of the UFOs from the famed Planet X.
Passage off of Planet Earth will be offered only to dues-paying CoS members. “We are the only religion that offers Eternal Salvation or Triple your money back!” states the Khan of All-Shanghai, Rev. Shining Path of Least Resistance. “Now is your last chance, my friends, memberships (US 30) will be available to all comers, foreign and Chinese, up until the fateful hour!”
The Church, an underground institution since 1981, has attracted an odd following of artists, writers and musicians (including David Byrne of the Talking Heads and Mark Mothersbaugh of Devo) who follow the teachings of Dobbs and his promise of Slack. “Slack is quitting your job, then making a million by mistake,” offers Rev. Shining Path, “it is the opposite of paranoia and it’s the power source for “Bob’s” grin.” But, he warns, there exists a massive Conspiracy of normal people to deprive the SubGenii of their Slack, a fact which now necessitates the July 5th evacuation into Space.
• The CoS’s outreach arm, the SubGenius Foundation has published four books, including the latest, the Bobliographon (Thunder’s Mouth Press).
• Over 1,150 broadcasts CoS’s weekly radio show, THE HOUR OF SLACK have been heard over regular stations.
• News of Worldwide July 5th activities can read on the CoS’s massive, never ending website www.subgenius.com.
A Shanghai venue for the Church’s first X-day Drill in China will be announced just before July 5th on Facebook. Rev. Shining Path, the permanent Shanghai station chief, is available for interviews at the above number and e-mail. “Slow news week? No problem!” he promises. Asked if authorities will frown on the event the Rev. notes “Our man “Bob” is the consummate negotiator”, noting that Dobbs advised US President Nixon during his first trip to China in 1972. “His suitcase full of cash usually does the trick in a jiffy.” |
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shinpath
Seeker
Joined: Aug 05, 2005
Posts: 69
Location: Osaka Japan & Shanghai PRC
Status: Offline
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June 21, 2009 - 07:31 PM |
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hmm 58 views, 58 who will now say they have heard of "SubGenius." Of those maybe 20 followed the links to the site, of that 20, half "didn't get it" and moved on to the People magazine site, and maybe now 10 of you are intrigued enough to consider getting more information. So do it, before July 5th! Mind you, originally back in 1981, we said the world would end for the normals on July 5th, 1998. When that happened half our membership left the Church, the other half came back next year, and now that missing half has been COMPLETELY replaced with new members. We are religious fanatics, we don't care, eventually "Bob" will get it right. |
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shinpath
Seeker
Joined: Aug 05, 2005
Posts: 69
Location: Osaka Japan & Shanghai PRC
Status: Offline
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| Posted:
June 23, 2009 - 07:09 AM |
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To prove our fanaticism I'll offer anyone a FREE DVD of our feature film ARISE!
That's right a full-length explain-all DVD for Zero RMB. It will come discretely in
a simple white paper envelope. Just PM me with a snail mail address. No salesman
will call! Hurry, only a week and half to save your soul! |
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skyline5k
Board Legend
Joined: Sep 06, 2004
Posts: 10510
Location: is behind you with a knife O_O
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June 27, 2009 - 02:15 AM |
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Ordained minister. Nice. Do you get your ministries outsourced from Universal Life Church? I believe my old friend, Rev. Sweet Baby Bitch would be highly interested, as he and myself were ordained years ago on one drunken Saturday night, just after a rerun of South Park. I do miss those crazy college days.
~ Yours Truly,
Rev. Booty Bombastic. |
_________________
"Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony."
~Dennis |
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shinpath
Seeker
Joined: Aug 05, 2005
Posts: 69
Location: Osaka Japan & Shanghai PRC
Status: Offline
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| Posted:
June 27, 2009 - 02:12 PM |
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Greetings skyline5k. No, the CoS does not outsource from Universal Life, because they try to go for the tax exemption and we don't. While we promote "Bob," revel in Slack, and fight the Conspiracy, we are a for-profit organization who pays their taxes every year. Our advice: get in on the ground floor of a lucrative, money making cult NOW while rates are low. What are you doing the night of July 4/5th?
Cheers
Rev. Shining Path of Least Resistance |
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