Expats, Shanghainese Women, and the Asian Fascination

If you’ve been around Shanghai or lived in China for a while, chances are you’ve noticed it – the all too common white expat male who seems to have a fascination with all things Asian: Asian culture, Asian food, Asian language, and most notably, Asian women. If you haven’t noticed this phenomenon already, try doing a little research for yourself. Dive into the “Dating, Singles & Relationships” forums on ShanghaiExpat. Take a trip to the local expat bar and strike a conversation with one of the many expat men who are trying to figure out where to meet a local Shanghainese girl. Take a walk by the beautiful Xihu and take note of the many older, white expat men who have been strolling alone by the lake for years, hoping to attract the attention of a young Asian girl.

In many cases, it seems that not only does the interest in Asian culture seem to be preceded by a penchant for Asian women – this attraction tends to be fuel for the fire. What is it about local Shanghainese women that captures the attention of the white expat male? With so many types of women to choose from, what incites these men to date Asian women exclusively? While the answers to this question can be highly subjective, much insight can be found by digging through expat dating forums, reading through expat writings on the subject, and by interviewing expat men in China who have caught the so-called “yellow fever.”

Why the Fever? 

One of the most common reasons expats cite for having a preference for Asian women over Western women, surprisingly, is their supposed traditional values and the idea that they tend to treat men more lovingly and supportively than Western women would. Asian women are seen as being more tender, sweet, submissive and conservative than their Western counterparts. As a result, men tend to view them as less likely to cheat, and more devoted to family, husband and home. Western women, on the other hand, are often seen as wily, unpredictable, sexually liberated women who have been fed a steady diet of feminist magazines and are far too career-focused to be satisfied with only the roles of wife and lover. One of our beloved ShanghaiExpat forum participants illustrates an extreme version of this view:
 
“[My girlfriend] is coming over tomorrow around 3:30 for a few minutes before work and I am gonna ask her to marry me. Is there anything I should know about Chinese tradition or something? I plan on just telling her matter-of-factly that she will be my wife. She knows I'm the boss but recently has been acting like little miss independent. I need to nib this problem in the bud…As for western women, they are simply not an option. I would never consider marrying a western woman. They aren't family oriented, they have no reason to stay in a marriage after they get bored, they are constantly in competition with men, they act like men, they aren't feminine, and most of all they aren't happy. I would only ever marry a virgin - I haven't met a virgin in the States since I was in high school. Anyways, I want to make this girl mine, permanently. I need a companion in life.” – ChinaBrah

Shocking as ChinaBrah’s statements may seem, they are an extreme example of the underlying sentiments that some expat men hold, making them much more interested in pursuing Asian women over Western women as potential partners. Western women are sometimes seen as having too many other options, whereas Asian women are seen as possibly more devoted to their relationships and to family. The notion that the average Asian female will work to repair a broken or faltering relationship while avoiding the dreaded "D" word "divorce" is one that stems from the perception that most Asian women will work harder to maintain a peaceful home and family life. Western women, on the other hand, are perceived as the type who would file for divorce in a heartbeat.

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