Hello everyone,
I'm gonna have to plan my wedding in China before having it in my hometown next summer.I have no idea how does everything work here. My fiancee is Shanghainese, and we'd like to celebrate it in a fancy hotel in Shanghai. Do you have any tips or advice on what door to knock on? Are there english speaking wedding planners in Shanghai? And also, I really need to know what should be done during a Chinese wedding, I've only been to one of them, and I didn't understand all the things they were sharing and saying in front of everyone.
Are there other threats about this topic on the forum?
Thanks for your help.

Where are you from yourself?

Anyways, I had a wedding in China. I would say that wedding planners are pretty essential no matter where you have a wedding.

One thing I would say to you is that there is no such thing as "traditional" wedding hin China, they vary dramatically. Both by city and even within city.
So if something is suggested to you as being an important tradition, performance, ritual or even time or date, that should be incorporated into the day, it probably isn't. Possibly many Chinese people you ask will have never heard of this "tradition".

Just pick stuff that you think sounds cool or interesting. If you don't fancy something, don't be under pressure to include it, as it is not necessary.
Some people for example like to dress up like emperors and say it is traditional, but their parents or grandparents would never have done something like this. More like a fad than a tradition.

The only bits that are essential are big round tables with lots of food and drink. The rest just do whatever you want.

All Western Hotels, Marriott, Hilton, Sheraton, etc, etc all have english speaking Wedding Planners.

I did a quick Google searcg and came up with some great sites that expalin Chinese weddings and what is appropiate and what is not

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First off congrats on gettin hitched.

To share some of my experiences, my wife is also shanghainese, we got married in Dec of 08', we hired Watabe Wedding Planner, a Jap co. thats based in Garden Hotel near HHL. I think we paid 50k for services, then about 100k to book the wedding ceremony at Hong Qiao (we wanted to do a traditional walk down the aisle like back in the US, so the lawn they had was the bonus). Wine and Bai Jou was addtional costs I think. We also hired a great host for our wedding, to intro/speak/move the ceremony along, also from Watabe, he did a killer job, everyone was happy and had great smiles/laughs.

Traditional ceremony events varies, I've been to about a dozen not including ours in 08, I noticed that alot of people do the walking down the aisle in the conference room/dining room where the event is held. Pouring champagne on top of glasses stacked. Bride/Groom going to each dinner table and lighting a candle in the center. Bridge changes dresses, sometimes in a qipao, or traditional clothing, and toasting to each table to celebrate the new couple, Video or Picture demo of before, how the couple met. Usually outside b4 the guests show up, they sign their name in a book. Some weddings when you sign your name, you get a raffle, then there are games/events during the 2-4hr event. Prizes and games, ie name that song, or answer questions of the couple, ie where was he/she born, when did they meet, etc. And of course a bus for relatives to/from the event. Some like to rent a fancy car for the couple to sit in, picking up the groom then to the brides home, sitting down with family and a small ceremony there, both parents giving red hong bao's to the newlyweds. Then a drive to the event, sometimes with a fleet of other cars behind, decorated with flowers, and pink ribbons on the side mirrors.

Theres more but I think this should give you a base to work with. I'd recco asking local friends and how they did their wedding and or asking some wedding planners here in Shanghai.


A few on/off topic things that I have noticed that alot of the 80'-90's generation kids being in the "local shanghainese" community what is usually looked/asked for during marriage.

Male:
-Apartment, with or w/o mortgage varies, 101% of the time the wife will need to add her name into the deed of the apartment, *if you deny this, prepare for hell to break loose, I have heard and seen it hands on when going to the Real Estate Office here in Jing An a few weeks ago, when I was buying an investment property (not for our wedding) where couples and parents got into it, the security guard didn't do sh1t obviously as its normal.

-Vehicle, yep better be brand new, and afaik plates are up to 55k/each this month, second hand plates are cheaper I think. Being a car-fanatic and some guanxi with the father in law, I bought a Cayman S in L.A. with a Step 1 Turbo and was able to ship it here to Shanghai, took about 4 months but was here b4 our wedding, then the plate was 36k. FYI don't expect plates to be cheaper anytime soon, so either go 2nd hand or new fast.

-Engagement+Wedding Ring, usually brand don't mean a thing, but depends on the Shanghainese "requirements" and your financial status if that makes any sense. Tiffany's at Jing An or Plaza 66 is a great place, unfortunately they don't offer the higher quality diamonds, I was able to snatch their only VVS1 @ Jing An.

-Other jewlery specifically matching necklace, bracelet, and/or watch.

-A sum of RMB given to the inlaws as a "trade" for their daughter in marriage.

But again all this varies depending on the "requirements"

GL Champ