Untitled wrote:Haha. I've tried both ways, and I have yet to deduce statistically which one is more effective. Taking it slow or moving in fast.

All and all it is a hodgepodge of confusion that men have struggled with for thousands upon thousands of years.

With this specific girl I was ready to marry her. Well, at least act like it. She was probably the best girl I have met yet in China. But she didn't make the time to see me for me to make a move. Kinda hard when your ready to go but she is always busy.

So whatever, I've moved on. For now a 500ml bottle of booze will be a good enough lover tonight.

caso wrote:

MeSoHorny wrote:I didn' get the point. What you want? Especially in a smaller city like yours there are only two types of girls, the ones everybody can have or the real girls you might be interested in. But what you expect from her? Play around with you for a year or so, be your GF, fukc her and leave her behind? She knows, that after this she will never find a local guy for marrigae anymore, not if she was with a foreigner. So if you are talking seriously, than only chase her if you really want to go that next level, that means marrying her later. You are in China, and not in Shanghai.

1000% right

AnnieTC wrote:

Untitled wrote:Hey, no worries. I got the hint. It wasn't hard. I'm not stalking her.

I guess my next question is that, it is that normal for this to happen all the time. Pending I'm not the ugliest person in the world, why is it that I can't find a girl to follow through.

It's cake getting numbers, digits, QQ, weixin, but when it comes to starting a relationship, it never happens. It's odd. If there was signs it would be obvious. Dates go bad etc. But for the most part usually everything is hunky dory then it just stops.

If I lived in Beijing, Shanghai, Shenzhen it would also be pretty easy to pick up girls, the bad ones. But I don't want that. So I am actually a good guy that doesn't want to hurt girls and just sleep with them, and I can't find one that wants that either. Kind of a juxtaposition don't you think.

It's frustrating. Of course I think I am super cool and a good guy, but why can't anyone else see that? My friend's wife is Chinese, she doesn't have any local friends or she would hook me up, even she is perplexed as to why in the hell I can't find a girl.

It is normal I think... there are so many awesome single girls out there... esp in big cities. So... don't think you're the only one being single in the world.

Sometimes it just happens, people might feel a bit attraction then as it goes, it just fades away. Perhaps you're not her type, perhaps she just wants to find someone who will definitely marry soon, perhaps she's just being polite to you. The movie 500 days with Summer is like that. When feelings fade, there is nothing we could do but to learn to let it go and move on.

Another thing is that, it could well be your frustration subconsciously affects the air you carry yourself. You might have done something that changed her mind, but you didn't realize that. It's hard to say judged this far.

I've encountered those things before too, and it makes sad as well. Then I just realize that I I have to let it go. After all love is free to go, if we don't give others freedom we won't be free either. So don't lose hope, but keep being a good guy who hopes for love and good relationship. It doesn't guarantee you a girlfriend soon, but it is simply good for your wellbeing.

anter wrote:

caso wrote:

MeSoHorny wrote:I didn' get the point. What you want? Especially in a smaller city like yours there are only two types of girls, the ones everybody can have or the real girls you might be interested in. But what you expect from her? Play around with you for a year or so, be your GF, fukc her and leave her behind? She knows, that after this she will never find a local guy for marrigae anymore, not if she was with a foreigner. So if you are talking seriously, than only chase her if you really want to go that next level, that means marrying her later. You are in China, and not in Shanghai.

1000% right

dito!

Don't occupy her time and spoil her future chances just because you want some company.
If you truly do have regard for this girl then let her go if she is just someone to date while you live in the 3/4 city.

Untitled wrote:

anter wrote:

caso wrote:

MeSoHorny wrote:I didn' get the point. What you want? Especially in a smaller city like yours there are only two types of girls, the ones everybody can have or the real girls you might be interested in. But what you expect from her? Play around with you for a year or so, be your GF, fukc her and leave her behind? She knows, that after this she will never find a local guy for marrigae anymore, not if she was with a foreigner. So if you are talking seriously, than only chase her if you really want to go that next level, that means marrying her later. You are in China, and not in Shanghai.

1000% right

dito!

Don't occupy her time and spoil her future chances just because you want some company.
If you truly do have regard for this girl then let her go if she is just someone to date while you live in the 3/4 city.

Anter, I don' t know if you read the post in it's entirety but I didn't get the chance to start hogging her time. And even if I had, I would of did so with good intentions. I am well aware of what happens after dating a foreigner.

Nevertheless, perhaps one day I will be fortunate enough to hog one lucky Chinese girl's free time and maybe even ruin her chances of ever dating a guy again. Someday, yes someday.